For events held by Apache projects, clearance needs to be obtained. Clearance is granted by VP, Brand (Shane Curcuru) usually in response to an email to trademarks@apache.org with a description of what is being requested. This is a private email list. The request should reference any discussion that has happened on dev and private lists to give complete context. For a list of events such as the continually ongoing NetBeans Days (to be renamed to Apache NetBeans Days), a blanket request is fine assuming that the (P)PMC has been involved, i.e., the committers on the NetBeans Apache dev mailing list. A description of the events and the involvement of the (P)PMC is what VP, Brand will use to either approve or ask more questions. Casual get-togethers with no commercial sponsors are easier to get approval for, which is exactly what the Apache NetBeans Days are.
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For publicizing NetBeans events, the Apache News posts at https://blogs.apache.org/foundation/ could mention those events, best is to contact press@apache.org for that. Apache has an Event Listing (https://events.apache.org/), that we'd also like to make use of.
Also see: https://www.apache.org/foundation/marks/events.html